My name is Jocelyn and I am addicted to computer games

My name is Jocelyn and I am addicted to computer games.  As a child I was given a gameboy one Christmas.  Tetris soon became my favourite thing to do.  I spent hours on that thing.  I can remember as a teenager when the internet was just becoming popular and accessible, I found Boggle.  I began to spend any spare moment I had playing it - I love word games.  Little did I know that the little seed I planted back then would continue to grow in me.  When we were first married I didn't have much work so I turned to that lovely computer again for entertainment and purpose.

I go through long periodst in my life where I play no games at all and then when I do, I make up for it in a hurry.  The thing is, when I am playing games it distracts me from real life.  I find myself ignoring things and people that I normally would engage with.  My prayer life suffers and my overall attitude for life changes.

This little seed grows into one big messy garden of death.  It is an idol in my life.  I know we all have them; some of us have more than others.  Some are longtime 'friends' and are hard to let go of and others sneak in the back door and creep up on us when we least expect it.

I love my current game selections and it took some convincing for me to do what I did today.  You know, you reason, 'It's just a game.  It's relaxing.  I don't have to play that much.'  The enemy loves to help me downplay my actions.  But the reality is it is an IDOL.  I know my bible, don't you?  The Lord is a Jealous God and he wants no other idols before him.  That includes this game.  Now, for some people computer games may be an innocent outlet and not what it is to me.  It may not have the hold on their lives as it does with me.  But if we are honest with ourselves we will see the things that have dug a groove into our hearts.

I don't want this idol in my heart anymore and so I blocked all my game applications on my computer.  Even if I want to play, I won't be able to play.  It feels good; it feels freeing.  Jesus is so much more important that any game I could ever play and I need him to know that and I need me to show it.

Now, I know that I will stumble, maybe even fall, but for today, for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.